BETWEEN

BETWEEN

between the difference

lucid dreams

nightmares

roll the music

unseen a darkness 

nothing  under

nothing standing

that gold coin unpossessed

a true Janus value

a parchment shadow

a memory, an echo

as witness and participant

in a disjointed path

searching for a destination

looking for that living colour

against nights black and white

where nightmare meets lucid dreaming

just before the gold coin 

lands

A. Mendoza, 2019

running in the dark

RUNNING IN THE DARK

to make an allowance 

for the shadow

written in the dark

avoiding the grey areas

it washes away the colours

allowing light

a white clarity

the only reflection

is pen and paper

running in the darkness

and living a private life

accompanying a Janus dream

that coin that never flips

because it is both

whatever you run from

and whatever you run to

a mirror, a pen and paper

A. Mendoza, 2019

CHANGE

CHANGE

look to the moon and it turns away

gaze into a shining and it hides

find the amazing that becomes covered with darkness

reaching for the light switch 

to find the button

the exit that is entrance

looking through a window from the outside

as the curtain closes

away from a shining moon

that button closed

reaching behind a closed window

the entrance that is exit

to what is hiding from the outside

finding the amazing

A. Mendoza, 2019

get to the point

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2tkKdo1myY

Where is it?

Where Is It?

to suddenly miss what was never missed 

before

to realize the pointlessness 

of time


to find something

inside

that magic is the living

the filled moments


discovery

along the ways of quiet

and then the smile

settled is all fate


like that even matters

fate doesn't understand

as we can

promised time is promised waters


along those streams

both frozen and steamed

in waves and rain 

as hail and as reflections


before 

the pointlessness of time 

inside

a discovery 

A. Mendoza, 7/2019

HOG

hedgehog harmony
 the hegemony of hope

piglet persuasion
 with cuteness

that beauty in the pig
 hogging charm

without the porcine influence
 rolling in the mud

in growth to become
 the boar

with tusks that swing
 to dig, to scratch, to uncover

harmony

A. Mendoza  4/20119

 

 

On the Wall

On the Wall

what’s on your mind

is that the solipsism_¹ of no choice

cogito ergo sum_²

are you sure you actually do

veritus³ in the mirror

what is the who

as the when and the thief

an unknown image

ignotum callim apscomsum⁴

cast aside to beyond the moon

to seek Castaly⁵

but find Frankenstein

living with leading strings attached

and plough sands

until we become like Cassiopeia

from living on a bean feast

magical is the thief

but the water has sand on the bottom

and the wine became vinegar

it’s never broken that never promise

mirror mirror

A. Mendoza, 1/24/2019

1internal mental state

2I think therefore I exist

3Truth and Fear

4A strange secret hidden

5A sacred fountain

Lodestone 0n A Hill

Lodestone on a Hill

opposites attract

depending what side

is the face

a single coin 

of two directions

sitting on the edge

of head or tails

yes or no

in a silence

to hear a voice

and touch

a single vibration

mirrors don't speak

as selfies won't

looking glass moments

to seek

to hold

to lose

and the silence in the glass

that cannot be seen through

becomes it's own coin

depending is the face

opposite is the side

is the coin glass

sitting in two directions

that single edge

of yes or no

in a silence

of head or tails

a single coin

that is the face

A. Mendoza, 1/21/2019

 

dElUSIoN

DELUSION

pseudo ego

making the pseudo

gratification

a release of self

as object

and physical entity

a parody soulless

to be murdered

by reality

unconscious annihilation

in that science of nihilism

an ego built

of pure imagination

an illusion of illusion

an awareness of the nothing

that play of light

in the darkness

escaping the great teacher

A. MENDOZA, JANUARY 2019

LOSE

LOSE

because you don’t live there anymore

you lose nothing

in the moment of creation there's change

when the music has played there’s silence

when the breeze passes there’s stillness

in the laughter

and in plain sight

while the love makers touch

creation matters not

silence is the music

stillness becomes the breeze

to play at laughter

and lose nothing

when moment is creation

there in the play is change

because you don’t live there anymore

you walk and lose nothing

A. MENDOZA, 12/2018